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Of course, I'm broke most of the time and you're fucking rich so you should add several more dollars to every tip. If it's less than 40 cents to round up then add another dollar to the tip. In case you read this Patrick, here's my method for cabbies.
#Kane from menace to society how to
Third, it's clear that Kane's father is to blame for never teaching his son how to leave a tip. A hometown hero celebrity like Kane probably isn't going to have the problems you or I did when we tried to sneak in some booze as a 20 year old. The only thing less shocking than when it comes out that the Kanes were drunk is the fact that some establishments in Buffalo may have served them. That's not going to shock anyone but seeing as how Kane has yet to reach the legal age to drink spirits it could just add another layer of cluster to this fuck of the summer. The second is that almost without a doubt - alcohol is involved. Although Patrick wouldn't be the first male of a smaller stature who gets a bit punchy at the slightest provocation when alcohol is involved. So the big thing to keep in mind is that it does NOT say who the actual puncher is. They can't even confirm who the other Kane is. So lets break down several of the points in this story, shall we?įirst up, details are insanely sketchy right now. click the jump for more thoughts and discussions.
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I'm guessing that the "relative" is his cousin because it's one of the great truths of the world that going out drinking with your cousin always ends badly, always.Īnd so the off-season of insanity continues. So in case you didn't see the news below, Patrick Kane and his "relative" were arrested last night for robbery, fourth-degree criminal mischief and theft of services. You look at your dog, patiently waiting to continue his walk, and say, "Well Jackson, looks like we were wrong when we thought this off-season couldn't get any worse and it was finally OK to just enjoy the summer, huh? Lets hurry back to SCH headquarters (aka - the futon in your living room) and see what's up." He's not fit to be a member of society", says your good friend Dave - a well known Red Wings fan and all around asshole. "The fuck?", you think.īefore you can put the phone back in your pocket you get another text, " Patrick Kane deserves to be thrown in jail and banned for life, that scumbag criminal miscreant. "You're gonna have to write about this, I'm in the middle of a fantasy draft" says one Sam Fels. Suddenly, your phone rings and you have a text message. You're out taking your dog for a nice long walk enjoying the sunshine. You're slightly hungover from the night before but you've already downed several pints of water and a handful of Advil. Let me set the scene for you - it's finally great warm summer weekend.